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Friday Night Lament: Fuzzball 22 April Showers Bring May Flowers by Fuzzball
Hear me, kits and kittens! Don't come visit the Fuzz menagerie in April… The weather changes So there I was. Saturday night. DVD player was smokin'! I was empowered - the remote was MINE… "The Cat In The Hat", followed by "Cat Ballou", then "Cats and Dogs"… with plans to max out the evening with a recording of the musical "CATS"! |
Mom was reading one of those Changeling Press books so she was off in another world. I had the Bose System cranked… Fancy Feast Gold Crunchies at my elbow (if I had one), Papa and Razzi taking turns fanning my long, elegant (hot) fur and doing gentle massages… Ahhhhhhh! It was the best of times - soon to be the worst of times.
Suddenly - in the middle of "Me-mory - All alone in the moon-light…" I hear a screech! Mom comes racing down the hallway with (dark music and drum beat here) the dreaded CAT CARRIER! The large one. That isn't used often. Unless more than one of us fur kids has to visit the demon incarnate a.k.a. vet.
With no warning, no preparation, no indication of the fact that she's lost her mind -- she stuffs me in the carrier! WITH PAPA AND RAZZI! Then she bolts down the hallway and slams into the bedroom closet with a flashlight and a battery-operated radio. And then I remember… It's Springtime In Texas. That can only mean one thing - Tornado Watch~~~
Sure enough - she started putting blankets and pillows out and hunkering down for a long night, muttering all the time. "High pressure and low pressure. 100% chance of rain up to 8 inches per hour. 80 MPH straight line winds. Shelter in the lowest, smallest interior space in your home. Yeah, right. Try that with three cats."
As one of the three cats I'd have liked to know what she was complaining about -- she was sitting on the floor OUTSIDE the cage. I was in there with two frightened felines. Panicked pussies. Cats that want to scat. I'm sure you get the idea, kits and kittens. But let me expand on that thought for a moment. Did I mention that they are phobic about the CAT CARRIER? Since the last time they were in it was when they went to the vet to be 'fixed?' There were eight frantic feet in there, and all of them were gouging some vital part of my body, sort of like an octopus on acid…
And no litter box.
It was a looooooong night.