by Celia Kyle Celia Does Your New Best Friend... Condoms! Condoms? Your best friend? I know, I know... You're sitting in your comfy chair, looking at the screen and saying "whothefuckwhat?" Condoms, whether you are a man or woman, truly are your best friend. Let me tell ya why... The number one reason just about everyone is thinking of has to be for disease prevention. From icky antibiotic demolished infections to HIV, condoms definitely keep your pink bits clean and a little less white and oozing. Yuck! Coming in at a close second (though for me, it's actually first) is pregnancy prevention. His little swimmers get caught in the plasticy goodness that is the condom and stays far away from your eggs. Think of condoms as your pregnancy cootie shot. Only, instead of circle, circle, dot, dot, it's more along the lines of rip, tear, slide it there and cooties be gone! Woot!

"But Ce," you say, "I'm in a committed relationship and on the pill, why do I need condoms?"

Oh. You do. (I mean, other than the fact that the pill is only about 98% positive.) Let me assure you that your sex will start featuring condoms. No, guys, I'm not trying to convince your gal to force you to don flavored condoms to make blowjobs more fun for them. Nope, this revolves entirely around my hate of cleaning. I hear you now, "What?! Condoms help with cleaning?!"

Yes, they do.

Single, married, in a relationship or just having fun with a fuckbuddy, gals, you're going to love this... Put condoms, on your toys. Seriously. I'm not talking about lubricated condoms or condoms with spermicide... I'm talking plain ole' latex condoms. The cheaper the better.

Now, when you get down and dirty with your cute little bullet vibe that rocks your world and the fatigue that comes from coming like a freight train barrels over you, all you have to do is trash the condom and toss your toy in the drawer. No more dealing with bodily fluids, special "toy wash" or walking off the orgasm high as you trudge to the bathroom to clean the Purple Yurple.

Want to know one of my fave places to snag a box or four? Condomania. www.condomania.com. Yup, they've got just about every type of condom you could ever want, need, desire or get curious about. For the guys, they even have custom condoms. Can't ever get the "right" fit? Why not get a custom for the Thunder Down Under? Yeah, you know what I'm talkin' about...

I'll see ya'll next month when I really do Jade Buchanan. All you drooling men out there get ready for a wild show!

Celia Kyle